"You must make a choice to take a chance or your life will never change." Something I read today somewhere. The past few days have been extremely difficult for me.. and Frank too. I think my feelings, especially about the privacy issues, have started to rub off on him. I feel bad but it's the truth. :/ I don't know why, but I've been a little out of control in the sense of what I want to change lately. I've been spending lots of money, eating a ton of junk, and generally not doing what I want for myself. X_X What The Fuck?! It's discouraging but I keep telling myself I'm just preparing, and that's what happens when you prepare for something you've never done.. fail. I guess coming here and blogging about it might be a sign that I'm still willing to try.
I got a hair cut the other day and touched up the black. The blonde streaks are soon. My poor hair. :( It's so much harder to hear an actual stylist tell you how bad your hair is.. I mean, I already knew but I was just trying to fool myself. As of next week, another commitment to be made is investing in a very expensive shampoo and conditioner. I was recommended Joico Moisture Recovery for my extremely dry hair and I'm going to try it. My other recommendation is to completely stop using box dye kits and only using professional color or getting it done at a salon once, and only touching up my roots every 6 weeks. Hair cuts are necessary every 6 weeks if I continue to fry my already blown out hair shaft. D: *sounds horrible* This is what it's going to take to be long though. I've been CRAVING a fun color in my hair.. but alas my priorities have stayed somewhat in order.
The only other thing I've done successfully on my list is get a new Social Security card since mine was lost or stolen. The next step toward that is applying for food stamps. Ugh.
My main issue this week has been my lack of privacy. I'm a 20 year old girl trying to live in a living room... with her boyfriend, Dad, and Grandmother (who has dementia). Seriously? Why am I doing this to myself...? I don't know. I'm so ready to go (mentally not financially) but everything in life likes to get in the way. :( I don't even know how to begin to bring it up to dad... Especially with Grammy needing the help..
I'm really hoping I can recover this month after the wedding.. Maybe I'll start to see a direction.
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