It's always awkward going back into work after you've called out, I can't help but feel like people don't believe me whenever I call out.... maybe because of my age? Who knows. Regardless, work was rather lame today while feeling under the weather and as soon as I got home I felt the need to continue my pace and clean up around the house a little and then go out and shop with Dad. Going to Vons after a tiring day at work (Vons) is the very last thing I should be doing. I sacrificed my (day 1) work out to go shopping for fruits and veggies so I could come home and aid my sick Prince... It ended up taking 2 hours to shop, and 2 more hours to juice, clean up, and put everything away in the kitchen. So here I finally sit to blog and I don't even know/remember what I want to say. Overwhelmed.
Emotionally today was difficult, I thought about Mom a lot.. It usually happens while I'm alone at work (which is almost every evening shift) and I zone out. I'll hear a song that reminds me of you, a thought that just brings you up, a familiar face, and a lot of the time it just comes as if I started thinking of you for a reason.. A reason more powerful than I can understand... As crazy as that sounds, I believe in those things. Besides thinking about my Mom, the thought of moving out has been looming over my head for months now and some days it's stronger than others.... Today was one of those days, it's like I "re-wake up" and realize how uncomfortable I am here and have to do something immediately to change something around me. It's been even more difficult because Frank has gotten really sick, whereas I just haven't been feeling well, and that comes with a whole wave of other emotions. I always feel alone in my head even though we have each other... then again I feel that way to everybody.. and I always have. It's like I'm just on another page or something, like I see the world differently. But back to Frank, it's so hard to watch him suffering and instantly in return I start stressing on his health, why he feels that way, and how I can help, dragging my emotions down further.
Progress that has been made ::
My SS card came in the mail (not that I know what progress that shows?!).
I went shopping for some food.
I sorted what needs to be washed (like 3-4 loads ugh!)
I cleaned the ratties, and the fishy's homes :) and spent some time with Lily Chili. :) :)
I still came to blog even though I really didn't want to and I didn't know what to write. <-- very good.
A photo from before the wedding. <3
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